Loving someone who doesn’t love you back can make you believe like your world has come to an end because the pain and hurt you’re going through is very real. Even science has revealed that rejection boost the hurt sensing neurons in your brain just like a physical pain. So, you can’t manage and control how you suffer and in this way can’t move on in your life. Only those who have been through all this and succeeded to come out in one piece will tell you their experience, feeling that they’ve been to some war.
The most painful time in life is when you still deeply love him and the other person makes an announcement that he doesn’t love you anymore. This brutal news may prove to be a complete shock or it may be like something that you may have felt long before he officially ended the relationship. At that time, the best thing you can do is to respect their decision.
The matter actually becomes worse when you can’t help yourself stop loving him and I am well aware of how do you love someone and the pain of his not loving you back in the same way. You need not worry about that because here are some points on how to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you. It will surely help you heal and forget all about that painful experience.
Here Is The List Of Some Points On How To Stop Loving Someone Who Doesn’t Love You.
14. Repetition and Subconscious Mind
More often it seems difficult to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you. The studies on human psychology suggest that the reason is that your subconscious mind didn’t actually accept the whole situation. Repetition is one of the great ways to convince one’s subconscious mind to have faith in something. The more you repeat the statements that your relationship is over, the more the fact is likely to develop into a strong belief.
Therefore if you really want to stop loving someone then stop right there. Don’t even think about such phrases: I will die without him, or I can’t stop myself from loving him/her.
13. You cannot rule the other person
After learning that someone you love doesn’t love you back, your immediate reaction might, “I will make her/him love me.” To be honest, this thought is very natural but at the same time of no use. You should understand that you can only control your own actions and feelings. Even sometimes your own emotions are uncontrolled. So how you can persuade another person into feeling something he/she doesn’t want to.
12. Don’t get obsessed with your feelings
Don’t make that person the center of your life. Most often people just start thinking that their life will end with the end of relationship but that’s not true. If you keep on doing things to make him happy even it does harm to you or somewhere you feel that if you’ll stop doing all this for him, he’ll leave you, you’re not doing good with yourself. You’ll get obsessed with all such things. Give yourself some space because you’re the only person who can accept and love you as whatever you are. Don’t get obsessed with your feelings and let them go. All such acts will surely help you.
11. Get rid of mementos
When it comes to how do you stop loving someone you know you can’t have him, and then an important step is to get rid of all those triggers that make you think back of your ex. So, don’t waste even a second in deleting your old emails, pictures and texts with him. They are nothing more than a self-torture for you creating major setbacks in your healing process. Imagine each memory a balloon drifting far and far away from you. The physical objects that are in good form, donate them to a needy person.
10. No point in being ‘just friends’
When you get to know that the person you love doesn’t love you back, it turns out heartbreak. It hurts. If you want to stop loving that person then you have to build your willpower. It would be the best and safest idea. Distance yourself from that person and don’t reply to his texts. If he contacts you out of pit or may be guilt, then don’t let yourself to go back to that situation. Don’t respond to his phone calls under any circumstances. Unfriend him/her on social media and hide or delete the person’s previous posts. There is no need to constantly remind yourself about that person as it will make harder for you to keep distance.
9. Maintain social contacts
It may be impossible to stop thinking about that person but you can distract your thoughts. Once you have mourned over the loss of that relationship, socialize yourself with others. You should avoid sitting alone at home, crying over spilt relationship. The more time you spend time alone, the more intense the feeling of “I miss you” will get. It's important to keep positive social contacts to overcome the depressed feelings. Call your friends and arrange a get together. Watch a comical movie. Find an interesting activity to engage yourself.
8. Refocus yourself
This is one of the best ways to stop you dwelling on emotional pain. When you were busy in loving someone, you may have neglected yourself. Now it’s the best time to find out your own worth. So get up and make a list of all those awesome things about yourself that you can remember. Express your love for yourself about these things. There might be some aspect that you’d like to work on. Just go for it. Embrace your freedom and try out whatever you want. Experiment with some cool hair style, get a new outfit and give yourself a makeover. These Lego blocks will give you a real happiness that doesn’t come from anyone else. The source is YOU.
7. Take it as an experience
Although it hurts when one have a broken heart. But you can re-frame this rejection as a learning experience. Then it will be more than just a gloomy situation in your life. You can use it to encourage a positive future growth. Remind yourself that you have learned things like self-confidence and strength. You will get to a better understanding of your feelings and desires. But if you have fallen for those who have refused you more than one time, then you might be subconsciously selecting individuals. In that case you need to talk to a therapist.
6. Avoid the blame game
It’s just like that as you have no control over falling in love with that person; he has no control over not falling in love with you. If you go around blaming him all the time for "friend-zoning" you or thinking that he is a terrible person for not loving you, you’ll be unfair with that person. Avoid this because all this blaming won’t let you heal, instead it’ll keep on adding to your pain. Your friends may also try to villainies that person for not loving you back. If that so, thank them for supporting, for it will help you focus on getting over him.
5. Change your routine
Doing something amazing, such as plan for some vacation or even taking a change route to job, is one of the best ways get rid of the previous habits and change them with the new ones. If you can’t do this, bring little everyday changes like try a new go around on a Saturday night with friends or visit a new part of town. Another way is to learn a new hobby such as cooking or swimming. You should try to keep away from doing something super drastic and before doing that you should make sure that you truly want to do that. Just focus on those things that are a source of pleasure for you because all such sort of activities or changes will aid you in your healing phase.
4. Stay encouraged
The steps that make you towards getting over the other person should be celebrated. Just know at what time you're prepared to move on. Keep this in your mind that there's no set time period for moving on from unrequited love because everybody goes at a different pace. One of the signs that you're prepared to move on is that you start to notice what is happening with other people. It’s because in the grieving phase you get a bit absorbed in yourself. So, now you are on your way of healing process. Finally you've started increasing your list to include stuff that isn’t about love or the pain you get in love.
3. It's over
The presence of hope is one of the main reasons that people mostly believe the loss of their loved ones and fails to believe breakups even for years. Remember that your mind is never going to prompt the recovery procedure if it doesn’t make sure that there is not even a single expectation of returning back. If you want to get well faster from breakups, you’ll have to kill expectations completely. Most importantly, there shouldn’t be day dreaming regarding that person you broke up with or by waiting for that person to make a call to you and celebrating and wishing that one day you both will meet somewhere by coincidence. Just remind yourself that it’s all over.
2. Get rid of relationship dependency
There are many people in the world who get into relationships because they want to forget about the pain, more precisely the problems in their lives. If you managed to become less dependent on the relationship, here is good news for you that you can easily get over the breakup. So, learn to face the problems of life instead of escaping to a relationship. It will also give you strength and courage that you have potential to bear any disaster in your life alone. Believe me your life will be much better in this way.
1. Chat it out with someone
It’d be ideal to get the emotional side of the curing process off your chest as soon as possible. It will be of great help to you because if you just stick to those emotions, it will get harder to free them in the long term. So, the best option is to talk to someone who is trust worthy and tell him about what you're facing and what you're feeling. Moreover, you can journal it regarding your feelings if you don't wish to talk to another person. It’ll be very helpful, if you’re making a conversation with someone who has gone through the similar experience before because he can understand your problem much better than others.
If you have also gone through such a painful experience, you must consider this article. It will be very helpful to you and don’t forget to share it with others too. It will certainly give you a motivation to move on and enjoy a wonderful life ahead. I am sure that after reading this article and following all the points, your pain can vanish and happiness can all be yours. You can do your work more attentively because a great burden has fallen off your head. Once all your pain is gone, you will feel light and come to know that you have got so much courage and strength that you can face any challenge in your life. So, finally you are ready to lead a new and happy life.